Amidst turmoil and chaos

Even if roleplaying has been the most continous thing in my life from eleven years of age until now, fifteen years later, it has seldom gone so far as to actually play very often. My most common stance has actually been the aspiring roleplayer, with all the props that you expect from such a person: unfinished maps of ridiculous quality, sketches of new games with nothing more than lists of weapons and four digit skills.

Then suddenly, about two years ago activity suddenly spurred and roleplaying was not longer only discussed, but also played. A strange activity peak at the end of a quite long university visit. Not only dice were thrown, I also found my self in a Russian submarine in Denmark, without even pretending. But the strangest situation of them all was standing in a bathroom, staring in the mirror to prepare for the final move towards another man. A man played by my friend Fredrik. I guess it's not as silly as you first think that situations closer - but definitely different - from your normal situation are experienced as more strange. If you work as a driver of dog sleighs in 1934 and someone explains about Yog Sothoth and how unimportant and useless human lives are, that easier to accept than love for another man.

Because of all this aforementioned chaos and turmoil I have participated to a much lesser extent in roleplaying activities the last months. I guess I will sort that out any day soon. At least we will go to Gothcon in Easter, mostly to roleplay. In addition to three scenarios we will also play a chapter in our ongoing Orpheus soap opera.

Keeping up long campaigns seems to be the easiest thing in the world for many gaming groups. For my gaming groups it has always been impossible, and I'm not sure it's a bad thing. But now two really long campaigns (over twenty sessions is really long in my part of the gaming community) are still ongoing. And I'm not certain it's a good thing.

This Orpheus campaign has been quite successfull. I must say I really like the game and the storyline that runs through the books. But it's just too damn long. When hell freezes we will still have two books left. The once so enthusiastic game master now sometimes mumbles about this hatred that is bubbling inside of him. At those moment I avoid his eyes.

Anyway. This weekend we had a very brief Orpheus encounter. We didn't have a real session, but Anna lives in the wrong part of the country these days, and now, while visiting she wanted a short talk with only me.
We stepped out of our bodies, jumped onto my ghost HD and went up to a small hill that served as a making-out place for local teenagers (they have it in American movies, at least). Nagi (Anna) confronted Tadeusz in a way that girls in reality (and in movies) do. "Do we mean to stick together? Will we stick together when we move from here?" with the usual "As long as FBI don't start chasing us again and those hired ghost soldiers don't kill us first."-clause. After apropriate discussion about that Nagi continued with the question about Tadeusz almost beating his former wife to death. He couldn't say much about that, I'm afraid. She answered with letting him experience when two men killed her boyfriend while raping her for five hours.

That scared both him and me. Will we ever be the same?